Yes, emotionally unavailable men do miss their partner.
But as you may know from your own experience, getting him to feel or admit that he misses you, can feel like an endless uphill struggle.
It’s something my fiancée Karolina used to complain about A LOT with me, especially during our breakups…
Because guess what?
I used to be an extremely emotionally unavailable man too.
That’s why I want to talk about this difficult topic with you, because whether it’s about discovering the traits of emotionally unavailable men, noticing the signs that he misses you or if he’ll ever wake up to what he’s lost…
All of these things matter to not only understanding your position and value in his life, but will also answer the question of how you fix emotional distance in a relationship.
(if that’s something you still want)
And that’s exactly what we’ll cover in this post, by sharing some of Karolina’s and my story with you and how you can apply the lessons we learned to your own life.
What Are the Traits of an Emotionally Unavailable Man?
You may think you’re alone with your emotionally unavailable guy, but us men are, unfortunately, not as original as you might think.
A lot of us carry very similar emotional baggage from our pasts that we’re too afraid to unpack and face.
And this has a DEEP negative impact on our relationships.
So let’s first start with identifying 5 signs of emotional detachment in men that you might recognize from your own relationship:
1. He Has a Hard Time Committing to You
Whether it’s about long-term future plans or the often dreaded ‘What are we?’ question.
Anything Karolina would say that would suggest commitment to our relationship would scare the living hell out of me!
Now, the exact reason behind that, is a longer conversation.
But in short, it’s driven by a deeply seated fear of abandonment.
So I would stay emotionally detached in an effort to AVOID the dreadful outcome of the relationship not working out.
And as you might have experienced yourself, his fear then creates the very outcome he’s TRYING TO AVOID.
Which in turn makes him think that having his emotional guard up is justified and reinforces it.
And It sucks!
For both of you.
2. He Gives You Mixed Messages
To make matters even more confusing for Karolina, after struggling with commitment, I would then say or do things that made her feel appreciated and that I was serious.
Like randomly texting her that I miss her…
So naturally she was all: “Which IS IT then????”
These kinds of mixed messages tie back to the fact that I myself was unaware of my attachment towards her.
So if you’re wondering how to tell if a guy is confused about his feelings for you, it’s likely a sign that he’s just emotionally lost and unavailable.
3. He Often Judges Your Emotions as ‘Overreacting’
I was raised in an environment that vehemently shamed the expression of emotions or needs.
When this is your standard in your formative years, it becomes your ‘normal’.
And also plays a big part in what causes emotional detachment.
This means that when Karolina was emotional about something, the only way I could react to what she said was in the SAME WAY my parents treated me.
Which was to diminish, ignore and judge her expressing her emotions as ‘overreacting’.
When there was too big of an emotional load on me and I didn’t know how to cope with it, the solution was simple:
Go hide.
If you know this behavior from your own relationship, then you’ll have seen him bury himself in work, binge the latest Netflix series, be on his phone for hours on end or any other form of withdrawal to escape the crushing load of scary emotions.
5. He Doesn’t Notice That He’s Emotionally Unavailable
Lastly, but no less important, is that he’s likely UNAWARE of the fact he is emotionally unavailable.
As mentioned, to me it was the standard (or lack thereof) that was set in my childhood, that led me to being blind to emotional needs.
In the same way, many people go through their own lives being taught that their emotions are invalid, non-existent, stupid, etc.
Overtime, these lies become ingrained, and you accept them as truths.
THIS is what causes emotional unavailability and is what you’ll experience as some traits, which put a giant wrench in the gears of what could otherwise be a happy relationship.
So these are 5 traits of emotionally unavailable men to help you know what you’re dealing with.
Next, let’s talk about the, often cryptic, ways in which he might be telling you that he misses you.
5 Signs An Emotionally Unavailable Man Misses You
The problem with emotionally detached men is that they make it INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT to read them and know what’s going on inside their heads and hearts.
So if your relationship is going through a tumultuous time or you guys broke up and there’s little contact, here are signs to help you know that he actually misses you.
1. He’s Let You Into His Life
Even though Karolina and I hit some big roadblocks in our relationship due to me being emotionally distant…
I did actually involve and let her into my life.
So if your (ex)partner has introduced you to his friends, his family or made you feel at home when you were at his place, then these are ways in which he’s talking through his actions rather than words.
(Because words might involve scary emotions.)
A man who does this, has placed enough trust and value in his partner to let her into his life this much, which makes you someone he definitely cares about and misses.
2. He Helps You Where He Can
Despite his emotional limitations, he’ll do what he can to help with things he actually CAN DO.
I may have been emotionally unavailable, but I often made gestures that clearly communicated that I was interested in Karolina and wanted her in my life.
Even after our breakups.
Whether it was helping out with an assignment, checking in on her when she was sick or the classic, carrying heavy things for her.
So distant men find OTHER WAYS to communicate that they value and miss you, typically by helping where they can.
3. He Makes Some Effort to Change
Despite all the exhausting and heartbreaking arguments we had about emotional distance, I always TRIED.
I made conscious efforts to be more available and talk about my past and why I struggled with emotional attachments.
One of the ways to tell if an emotionally unavailable man loves you, is if he has made these kinds of efforts (as small as they may be!) know that this is a definite sign he’ll miss you!
4. He’s Been Vulnerable With You
As we talked about, the reason many men are emotionally unavailable is that they are terrified of being abandoned and rejected again.
They’ve been taught that their emotions are not valid and don’t exist.
So if he’s been vulnerable with you, by showing his ‘softer side’ through words, texts or even just facial expressions, then it’s another sign he’ll miss you terribly.
Because no emotionally unavailable man willingly displays vulnerability unless you’ve successfully earned his trust.
5. He Calls or Texts You
When men are having second thoughts or are trying to move on, they’ll resist contacting you.
So if he makes an effort to text or call you, maybe ‘Just wanted to see how you’re doing?’ or ask something like ‘What’s new?’
Then he most certainly is thinking about you and misses you.
The cold, hard fact is that an emotionally unavailable man often doesn’t realize he’s made a mistake until it’s too late…
The wake-up call doesn’t HIT THEM until you’ve truly moved on.
And some unfortunately chose to remain emotionally isolated their entire lives…
BUT I don’t want you to lose hope just yet!
Let’s talk about how you can try to CONNECT with him.
How Do You Connect With an Emotionally Unavailable Man?
We’ve talked about the 5 traits of emotionally unavailable men, the 5 signs that he misses you, and whether he’ll realize what he’s lost.
So how do you win an emotionally unavailable man?
I won’t lie to you, it’s difficult!
Karolina can attest to how nerve wracking it was with me, (but I also might just be particularly stubborn!)
But it IS DOABLE.
So in case you’re wondering whether emotional detachment is permanent, no IT IS NOT!
But in order to get through to him, you need to equip yourself with a couple of things:
Patience
Yeah, I know, cliché isn’t it?
But it’s true!
And yes, waiting sucks, especially if you’ve already been waiting for SO LONG!
But if you lose too much patience and push him, he’ll only use it as evidence to justify keeping himself emotionally hostage.
So do what you can, to remain understanding of his internal struggle with feelings and support him on his journey to gradually opening up.
We like to emphasize that every relationship problem has layers (yes, just like an onion) and you need to patiently peel away at them, one at a time, to get to the root cause.
And if you’re at your patience limit, take a break and give him space the right way, so there is no distance being created.
Earn His Trust
If he’s ever going to get over his emotional unavailability, he’s going to need someone who he knows to count on.
If you’re the brave soul willing to go on this trip with him, you’ve already earned my respect.
In it, we explain why relationship problems, like emotional unavailability, happen and go into detail about how to connect with him in a way that opens him up, instead of triggering his defenses.
This way he can feel safe to trust you with his feelings and you can finally have the emotional intimacy you deserve.
Expressing your love and appreciation for your boyfriend or husband is far more important than you think!
When you’re in a relationship with someone, people tend to assume that their partner knows what they are thinking or feeling.
But this mostly could not be further from the truth!
Deep down, we’re all insecure and riddled with self-doubt…
That’s why it’s so important to tell him how much you love him!
It will make your boyfriend or husband feel valued and appreciated. It will also encourage him to return the gesture and express his feelings for you, which in turn will make you feel more secure in the relationship.
When Should You Tell Your Boyfriend You Love Him?
The answer to this question is very simple: you should tell your boyfriend you love him whenever you feel like it.
In case it’s not possible because one of you is busy or currently unavailable, it’s best to wait for the moment when you can be sure you have his attention and that he will be able to receive what you’re trying to communicate to him.
Alternatively, you can always send him a text or leave him a little note he can open and read whenever he is ready.
This way, you don’t have to worry about the timing being right.
When to Tell Your Boyfriend You Love Him for the First Time
Telling your boyfriend you love him for the first time can be very vulnerable. That’s why it’s important not to rush it and to only do it when it feels right.
For example, I told my boyfriend (now fiancée) that I loved him while we were snuggling in bed.
It was a very special moment, a memory of which gives me warm fuzzy feelings up until this day…
I did it about three months into our relationship.
But there are no fixed rules here…
On average, research has found that men wait about three months to say ‘I love you’ for the first time, while women tend to need five months before their first love confession.
What to Do if You Want to Tell Him You Love Him, but You’re Scared
If you want to tell your boyfriend that you love him, but you’re scared, then maybe you’re simply not ready to do it yet.
Also, in my experience, sometimes you just have to take the leap and say the scary thing anyway!
It often ends up being much less of a big deal in retrospect.
50 Heartfelt Ways To Tell Him You Love Him
Here are some paragraphs you can use to express your appreciation and love for your boyfriend or husband. They can be used in person as well as for calls or over text.
I’ll start off with some general ideas that can be used almost on any occasion:
1. I feel happy when I’m with you
2. The time we spend together is really special to me. You make me feel alive.
3. I love to see you smile. It makes me happy when you’re happy.
4. You are my favorite person.
5. I can never have enough of you.
6. Being with you can never be boring.
7. I’m so happy to have met you.
8. You are simply the best.
9. You are my best friend.
And last but not least:
10. I love you!
Another great way to tell your boyfriend you love him is by appreciating something they said or did:
11. I really appreciate the efforts you’ve been making to impress me.
12. Thank you for being so loving and generous!
13. I had so much fun last weekend! Thank you for the wonderful time we spent together!
14. Thank you for being there for me. I really appreciate how helpful and thoughtful you are!
15. I really love how caring and generous you’ve been towards me.
16. Thank you for checking in on me. It’s so thoughtful of you to always remember to ask me how my day was.
17. I love how relaxed you are. You really help me calm down and chill out after a hard week. I really value this about you.
18. Thank you for being so patient and understanding towards me. I know I can be difficult at times…
19. Everything you do makes me fall more and more in love with you.
20. My life is so much better now, since you’re a part of it!
The next way you can tell your boyfriend you love him is by complimenting him on something you genuinely value about him.
Here are some examples for you:
21. I love how alive and energetic you are. It’s a great motivator and I have so much fun when we’re together.
22. You’re simply the best looking man in the world. I can’t keep my hands off of you!
23. I had a great time on our last date. Our conversation was so interesting! I really appreciate how smart and informed you are.
24. You looked so good last time we saw each other. I love your style!
25. I love how bold you are! You can really get me out of my comfort zone and let me experience things I wouldn’t dare try on my own!
26. You’re so passionate about things! I really love that about you. You are amazing. Never doubt that!
27. I love your taste in music. You made me discover so many awesome tracks!
28. I love how serious you can get about topics you care about. It makes me feel safe to be with a man who has a strong sense of direction!
29. You always take your responsibilities seriously. I really value that about you! I feel like I can count on you to always keep your word when it matters.
30. You’re always so calm and level-headed. You’re like a stable rock in my life, I can always lean on whenever I need you. Thank you for being there for me!
Flirting is yet another great and playful way to express your love for him. Giving him little hints that want him is bound to make him want you more…
Here are flirty paragraphs to tell your boyfriend you’re crazy about him:
31. Whenever I’m lying on your chest, I feel like I’m in the safest place in the world. I wish I could just stay there 24/7.
32. I love the shape of your lips… Can I trace it with my fingers?
33. Your hands are so big and strong. I love the way they feel on my body.
34. I had a dream about you last night. Guess what happened again…
35. It’s impossible to get any work done today because I can’t stop thinking about you.
36. I miss the feeling of having your strong arms wrapped around me.
37. I was thinking about last night all day today. Can’t wait to do it again.
38. I love the way you kiss me.
39. You make my dreams come true. In particular, a certain type of dream…
40. I’m so lucky to have found a guy who is smart, funny and insanely hot!
It’s also possible to show your boyfriend just how much you love him without using words. You can simply do things that will make him feel loved and appreciated.
Here are some examples of what I mean:
41. Give him a long hug out of the blue
42. Give him a heartfelt kiss
43. Play his favorite video game with him
44. Suggest watching a movie you know he loves
45. Give him a massage
46. Snuggle up to him
47. Take his hand and hold it while walking
48. Ask him questions about something you know he is really into
49. Give him a hand massage
50. Ask him what he wants to do and then go do that thing
Hope you liked my paragraphs to tell your boyfriend you love him.
Expressing feelings comes naturally to some people, while others struggle with it. I used to have a much harder time expressing my appreciation too, so I get how scary it can feel to show vulnerability and put yourself out there in this way!
If you feel like you could do with some support when it comes to this kind of struggle, you can find the help you need in a coaching call.
Here we will listen to you about your fears and blocks, and give you strategies on how to approach them and what to do to overcome them.
We will also give you tips on how to be more confident and doubt yourself less.
Do you feel like you keep on falling for the wrong guy? That the men you’ve dated ended up disappointing you over and over again.
Are you afraid that you are never going to find “the one” and will end up living all by yourself, adopting countless cats and being doomed to loneliness?
I used to be afraid of that a lot.
All my friends were moving in together or getting engaged to their boyfriends, while I couldn’t get any of my relationships to last.
I kept on facing the same roadblocks over and over again and repeating the same mistakes without realizing it.
But I finally managed to turn the tide.
I realized that finding the right man has little to do with looks or luck.
You have to have the right mindset to even be open to finding the right guy.
In this article, I will outline the three big principles that helped me find the love of my life.
1. There Is No Such Thing as Being Doomed to Loneliness
I used to feel like ending up all alone was just “my fate”.
Quite a few of my friends told me that they struggled with the same fear too.
When a relationship doesn’t work out the way you wanted, it’s common to start feeling like it was your fault.
You might start believing that you’re somehow defective and that’s why you can’t get any guy to truly fall in love with you.
This is a very common worry a lot of women have, and also a COMPLETE BS!
Everybody makes some bad decisions every now and then.
It’s just a part of being human.
There is no such thing as “being doomed to loneliness”.
2. Identify The Bad Things About The Men From Your Past You Were Blind To
Everybody has a certain type that they often end up falling for.
A lot of women have a thing for “the bad boys”.
But it’s important to keep in mind that nobody ever CHOOSES to get heartbroken.
The only reason we get deceived or stuck in unhappy relationships is that we’re blind to certain things.
For example, I used to be completely blind to some men being utterly self-centered.
You know the type of guy that could go on talking about himself for hours on end without letting me get a word in, yes, that used to be my type. 😅
You can imagine that none of those relationships ever worked out for me…
The thing was I used to be COMPLETELY BLIND to people not caring about what I had to say.
I thought that they were just “very talkative” or something.
Think back about your past relationships. Were there things that really surprised or shocked you about some of the guys you dated?
Was there something about them that you were initially completely blind to, that ended up being a total deal-breaker?
Identifying your own blind spots is key in NOT making the same mistakes in the future.
Ensuring that you are aware of these particular issues will prevent you from being deceived the same way again.
3. In Order To Find True Love, You Have To Know What You’re Looking For
A lot of people believe that true love is all about finding “the one” and that “if it’s meant to be” things will just magically fall into place.
I used to believe that myself.
In reality, things really don’t work that way.
You can’t count on destiny or some other higher power to sort things out for you. This kind of attitude will most likely just get you nowhere.
If you want to find true love, you’re going to have to go and search for it yourself.
YOU have to figure out what kind of relationship YOU are YOU looking for.
What does true love mean to you?
Are you a Cinderella, maybe you prefer Belle from Beauty And The Beast? Or are you more of a kickass Wonder Women type?
Are you looking for someone who will pamper and adore you, or maybe you seek to soften the heart of an angry beast? 😉
Be honest with yourself. Know your own preferences.
Figuring out what true love means to you personally, will make the search for it so much easier!
Conclusion
Everybody makes mistakes in their love life…
It happens to everyone. Sometimes it’s just bad luck.
Just because things aren’t working out the way you want them to, it doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you.
Identifying your own blind spots when it comes to certain types of men, will help you protect yourself in the future.
Taking charge of your love life and figuring out what exactly you’re looking for in a man will guide you and make the search for your own real love much easier.
If you have any questions about finding the right guy or if you’d like to vent about your horrible experiences, do so in the comments below and I’ll get back to you!
Some men resort to these types of games when they get to know another woman, whom they consider a better catch. Yes, a guy can ghost you for another girl!
Getting together with her becomes his prime objective but he wants to keep things vague just in case it doesn’t work out according to plan.
That’s why he tries to keep you – his first date – as a backup.
I’ve seen guys pull this move countless times.
They’ll first ghost a girl for a couple of weeks and then suddenly get back to her with some lame excuse like:
“Oh sorry, things at work have been so stressful, I just completely forgot about everything else…”
When in reality they tried their luck elsewhere but it didn’t work out. So they come back full of good excuses and stick around until the next possibility presents itself. At which point they might vanish again and reappear again and again!
The persons who is a guy’s second choice, rarely becomes the primary object of his affection. It’s much more likely that he will continue stinging you along this way until either you finally move on for good.
Yes, men can be very calculative sometimes and monkey-bar.
When a guy ghosts you, be careful if you decide to give him a second chance.
Keep in mind that if he truly cared about you, he would have found the time to let you know he was busy…
3. Men Ghost Women Because They Don’t Have to Deal With Any Negative Consequences
Ghosting has become such a prevalent practice since the age of the internet and online dating.
According to a study done by an online dating platform, PlentyOfFish, a staggering 78% of participants experienced being ghosted at least once!
The main advantage of online dating is that it provides a much larger pool of potential partners we may have never met otherwise.
This huge benefit comes with ONE BIG DRAWBACK though:
It allows people to be rude and treat each other badly without ever having to face any real-life consequences.
Most of the time, the person you match with on online dating platforms is a COMPLETE STRANGER.
You don’t have any ties or friends in common.
This means that if this guy acts like a jerk or ghosts you, he’ll most likely NEVER have to deal with any consequences.
You don’t know any of his friends.
And there is NO ONE to whom you could complain about his behavior to that would bring this matter back to him.
Regardless of how he acts, he‘ll never be dubbed as “flaky” or lose face in the eyes of the people whose opinion he actually cares about.
Unfortunately, the lack of accountability often brings up the worst in some people.
Also, you might take comfort in the fact that these types of guys are some of the LONELIEST on the planet, because they’re incapable of forming meaningful human connection.
6. They’re in a Relationship
These guys are honestly some of the WORST kind.
He’ll seem like the sweetest, nicest guy (because he knows how to work people) and have all the ‘fun’ he wants secretly, while being in a supposed committed relationship.
If you’re wondering how he feels after he ghosts you, let me give you the answer you likely don’t want to hear:
He feels ok.
When someone disappears and doesn’t even have the decency to tell you or at the very least explain themselves…
…they have little capacity for self reflection, remorse or feeling bad about ghosting. He most likely lives in denial of doing anything terribly wrong and feels like he can get off the hook if needs be.
My advice, feel free to reflect on the possible reasons he ghosted you.
But don’t waste your time wondering what the guy is feeling, when he didn’t even take your feelings into consideration!
Conclusion
When it comes to being ghosted, I’ve seen women often blame themselves for it and feel like they did something wrong.
That is mostly NOT the case though.
If you’ve been ghosted recently, you might be feeling regretful, like you missed out on something.
The truth is, you just dodged a bullet here!
Men who resort to ghosting are often immature and aren’t really looking for a serious relationship.
Guys who are too scared to be upfront about things, want to string you along or don’t have any standards or manners are NOT good boyfriend material.
You deserve better than that!
Now if you find yourself in a pattern of being ghosted by guys, or are struggling with a related dating or relationship problem that you’re not not sure how to deal with, we can help you out in a one-on-one Coaching Call.In a call, we’ll teach you what it takes to stop being ghosted and avoid those bad apples all together.
You’ll also get a strategy specifically tailored to your needs, and we’ll show you the exact next steps you need to take to attract men that you can count on and are on the same wave length as you.
I want to expand this post by answering some of the questions you guys asked in the comments and in our coaching calls:
When Do Guys Ghost in Relationships
One surprising but common situation where women get ghosted in relationship is when things start off really well and develop fast.
You finally feel like you’ve met a guy who giving you his full attention and isn’t afraid of commitment! The texts you back, initiates, talks about a future with you, so much so, it almost feels too good to be true.
Well, it’s because it is! Unfortunately…
We all put on a show when we first start dating someone. We put way more effort in our appearance, present our best side, hide our issues, pretend to be over our insecurities and so on and so forth.
Relationship ghosters tend to vanish when their issues finally catch up with them. They can’t keep up pretending that they’re perfect any longer. The reality of who they are is closing in, and they have to run and hide to keep their status and authority.
Guys ghost women in a relationship when it’s impossible for them to hide their real, not so perfect self any longer.
Do Guys Ghost When They Catch Feelings?
This is a common misconception that a lot of you guys brought up in coaching calls. You have a feeling that a relationship was progressing, a guy started really opening up to you and letting you in. he might have mentioned serious commitment or even talked about the future, only to then do a sudden 180 and ghost you shortly after.
A lot of you conclude that he must have started catching real feelings, and they scared him.
You’re then wondering if it’s worth waiting for him to get over his doubts and come back.
You see, loving someone isn’t just a feeling, it’s also a choice: you decide to let yourself be vulnerable and allow yourself to care. So do guys ghost when they catch feelings? Yes and no.
They might have been catching some feelings, but the fact that they ghosted you afterwards show that they lack the maturity to build a loving and stable relationship.
Yes, absolutely. Ghosting is a very cowardly thing to do. So yes, ghosters are so scared and intimidated that they don’t even want to tell you to your face what’s going on. They would rather hide and intentionally keep things vague.
Even if it was you who triggered a guy to act this way, it’s not your fault.
These kinds of deep-rooted insecurities or fears were there for him long before he met you.
The fact that he is scared and intimidated doesn’t excuse him, either.
As a man, let me reassure you, we’re not all like this! You really do deserve better!
Thank you for reading! Got any further questions or are unsure about any of these points? Leave me a comment, and I’ll get back to you.
4. He Frequently and Suddenly Drops off the Map Without Reason
If you happen to be in the early dating stages, then it’s natural you won’t know each other’s whereabouts since it’s all new and you haven’t built trust yet.
But if you’re in a relationship and have been sharing more of yourself with him and he isn’t, it might be a sign to look out for.
A friend of mine was in a relationship with a significantly older guy.
For hours or even DAYS at a time, he would just drop off the map and she’d have no idea where he was or what he was doing.
When a man is genuinely interested in you, he’ll take the time for you and be PRESENT.
You’ll see in his eyes that he’s genuinely into you.
Signs He is a Player Through Text
Being played by a guy always feels crap. Moreover, dating a player is a pure waste of time. That’s why it’s important to recognise the signs as early as possible!
A lot of relationships nowadays start through online dating. Because of this, first stages of getting to know each other often happen via texts and DMs (Direct Messages). That’s why I decided to include additional tips on how to recognise a player through texts:
6. He Keeps on Leaving You on ‘Read’
Everybody can forget to reply to a message every now of then. But if a guy keeps on leaving you on ‘read’ (Meaning he’s seen your message) and isn’t replying, that’s an entirely different story…
As mentioned before, there are guys out there who play women for sport. These kinds of men will resort to all sorts of power games to confuse you and make you second-guess yourself.
If a guy keeps on leaving you on read for hours, be sure to put your defensive walls up.
It’s a sign that, not only he is not serious about you, but also that he is playing games with you over text already!
7. He Stops Replying for No Reason and Gets Back to You Hours Later
Much like in the case of leaving you on read, stopping to reply mid conversation is a power move.
No, he is not suddenly just so busy.
He is leaving you awkwardly hanging on purpose. He wants to make you wait for his reply and doubt yourself: “Did I write something that put him off??”
A guy who does this is playing you through text.
8. He Cancels Last Minute Over Text
So you’ve spent at least half an hour getting ready for your date, you’re about to leave your place and then you suddenly get a text from him: “Gotta rain-check, something just came up…” If he’s repeatedly behaving like this, then be warned:
This guy clearly has no respect for your time and doesn’t consider you a priority.
If he did care, he would have let you know much sooner or at least had the decency to call and explain himself.
He is either a player or just an extremely inconsiderate and a rude guy. Best stay away, he is not worth your time.
9. He Keeps on Asking for Nudes
Everybody is sexting and sending nudes nowadays, it’s a great way to flirt and tease when apart.
However, the internet is not the safest of places. That’s why it’s absolutely crucial that you take your time to get to know each other and build trust before exchanging any sensitive messages or photos.
When a guy is intending on playing you, he will not bother waiting to get you to trust him. A player will cut to the chase and try to pressure you or guilt trip you into giving him what he is after as soon as possible.
A common way of doing it is by asking women to send nudes “as a joke”.
If a guy keeps on asking for photos of you and then backs out of it pretending that it was just a joke… only to do it again 15 min later, don’t fall for it.
Not only is he likely a player, but also definitely cannot be trusted. Whatever you send him, might end up on a site of ill reputation the very next day.
Conclusion
So in summary, watch out for these 9 warning signs that tell you he’s a player:
He’s frequently on his phone and hides it
He’s vague about where he’s been and what he’s doing
He bends the truth and lies
He suddenly disappears without communicating anything
He’s showing no signs of being interested in you as a person
He keeps on leaving you on read
He stops replying for no reason and gets back to you hours later
He cancels last minute via text
He keeps on asking for nudes
It’ll save you a lot of time and grief.
Hope you found these tips helpful and now feel like you can know for sure if he really likes you or is just playing you.
If you’re struggling with players in your dating life or would like some help with finding the right guy online or in person, then check out the Coaching Calls we offer.
In a call, we’ll give you a strategy specifically tailored to your needs and show you the exact next steps you need to take, to finally find and keep the man, that you want and you deserve in your life.
Additionally, we’ve got further reading you could be interested in. Like if the signs of a player fit for you, then maybe you need to finally write this guy off as yet another sad but hilarious dating problem.
You can move on and put your energy into finding the right guy for yourself instead, someone who is honest and straightforward with you.
If you’d like to share your experience with players or have questions, be sure to leave a comment and I’ll get back to you.
If you’ve been on even a few dates with men, you’ll definitely have experienced some hilarious and or even awkward dating problems.
Now I don’t mean to knock on men (we’re not all alike).
But sometimes we really take the biscuit with our weird dating behavior.
Here are the Top 5 I’ve had the pleasure of witnessing, one too many times…
1. Men That Expect You to Fawn Over Them Without Lifting a Finger
These types of guys are GREAT.
They’ll meet you at your set dating spot (On time, if you’re lucky) and make next to NO EFFORT to help the date go smoothly!
In this scenario, it’s all on YOU to ask questions, break awkward silences, keep the conversation afloat and anything else he just can’t be bothered with at the moment.
It’s like an involuntary piggy bag.
Now, I’m no woman, but the number of times I’ve seen female friends of mine have to awkwardly accommodate some guy that is LITERALLY just standing there is more than I care to mention…
How do you do it??
Even when we’re a-holes, you women are just mostly so goddamned NICE TO US!
2. Men Can Be Utterly Oblivious to Where You’re At
Continuing on the same note…
The same guy that won’t make any effort on your date, is often TOTALLY OBLIVIOUS to how YOU are feeling.
I remember sitting at a bar once waiting for a friend and couldn’t help being in earshot of an awkward date that was unfolding on the table next to me…
Her: <Breaking an awkward silence> “So you’re into computers ‘n stuff?”
Him: “Yeah, you know the newest qualcomm snapdragon 835 sets itself apart from its competitors with an advanced 10-nanometer compact design, requires less juice and can power some pretty high-end mobile devices that…”
And on he went FOR 15 WHOLE MINUTES WITHOUT STOPPING TO CATCH A BREATH.
Now, had she been into tech and computers too, that would be awesome!
They would have had a common interest and could’ve geeked out about it all night long.
But it was clear just how utterly oblivious he was to whether she was following or even INTERESTED in what he was rambling on about!
Nobody was home.
How he landed that date is beyond me, but needless to say I think it was their last.
3. Men That Love to Talk About Themselves at All Times
Yes, men love to tell the epic tales of how we slew the mighty dragon, rescued the damsel in distress and freed good people of the valley from oppressive tyranny with nothing but one sweep of our mighty sword.
I kid you not, some guys really see themselves this way.
You may have had the pleasure of happening upon one such fellow yourself.
I’ll admit that in my dating days, I too was guilty of trumpeting my tales to woo the ladies (who were likely bored of their skulls)
If you happen to be one such woman…
On behalf of men, do accept my most sincere apologies. We know not, what we say when our brains swell to such disproportionate dimensions.
Having said all of that.
I’ve observed women secretly amused and entertained as they egg boasting men on to ever greater exaggerations of their lies tales.
So I guess it can be funny.
4. Men Try so Hard to Impress You, It Can Be Embarrassing
I think it’s perfectly normal to flex.
Both women and men will show off their strengths to attract and impress someone they like.
But there are limits right?
Like when I guy goes WAAAY out of his way to impress you, that it becomes silly or even worse, uncomfortable.
There are countless hilarious and embarrassing videos on YouTube of men going a little too far to impress a woman.
They say love is blind.
It seems to me, it can sometimes render a man utterly blind to the inefficiencies of his silly mating rituals.
So much so, that he sends the woman he hoped to impress scurrying for cover.
5. Some Men Believe You Can Be Bought With Drinks or Dinner
“Can I get you a drink?” – The all-time classic opener.
There’s almost nothing less charming or flattering.
If you interviewed all the women that were approached by men during an evening at a bar or club.
What percentage of women do you think would tell you that the first thing they were asked was whether he could “Get you a drink?”
I bet it’s embarrassingly higher than we’d like to think.
We always believed that relationships should be FUN and uplifting! And we were obsessed with finding real-world practical solutions for our relationship problems. Today we help others do the same with our blog.
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