Photo by Drew Hays

Discovering that your partner has been lying to you can be an earth-shattering experience.

Unfortunately, I’ve made this extremely unpleasant experience myself.

I used to trust that people always mean what they say, but I was wrong.

And no one wants to build their life and invest in a relationship that’s based on lies.

That’s why it’s important to recognize the signs that your partner might be lying to you as soon as possible.

1. Your Partner Doesn’t Ever Let You Use His Phone

They say that eyes are the WINDOWS to the soul.

If that’s the case, then our smartphones are like DOUBLE GARAGE DOORS…

You can tell a lot about a person from looking through their smartphone, without even having to read any of their messages or emails.

Just scrolling through the apps can be enough.

So is your partner not letting you touch his phone a definitive proof that he is cheating on you?

No, of course not.

But it is proof of there being something on his phone, that he wants to keep hidden from you.

You might want to talk to them about this and clarify your concerns.

2. Reoccurring Periods Of Time During Which He Is Unavailable

This is one of the most obvious signs that your partner is doing something he doesn’t want you to know about.

Yet It’s so easy to miss this one!

I used to briefly date a serial cheater. He was definitely “dating” more than one girl at a time.

He’d always suddenly stop replying to my texts for a couple of hours every now and then.

Afterward, he’d come up with a lame excuse like “I had no reception” or “I fell asleep”.

It was a reoccurring thing. It happened every couple of days.

Turned out he was with someone else at a time.

He couldn’t just take out his phone and be like “oh, excuse me, I just gotta quickly text my other girlfriend…”

The point of this is, forbidden activities take time.

If there are reoccurring time periods during which you have no idea what your partner is up to (and he is not responding during that time), chances are he is busy doing something he doesn’t want you to know about.

3. He Always Agrees With Everything You Say Or Want

You’re probably thinking:

“WHAT?! How could my partner sharing all my wishes and desires, a bad thing?!”

After all, we girls dream of finding our perfect prince charming, who will sweep us off our feet and make all our dreams come true.

I used to believe in fairy tales too…

Unfortunately, the reality of perfect relationships is that if something feels too good to be true, it’s most likely not true.

I’ve witnessed a lot of people get burned by this one.

If your partner always agrees with what you say or want, it means that he doesn’t ever express his own preferences and desires.

In other words, he is HIDING his true colors from you.

4. He Gets Defensive When You Ask Certain Questions

Generally speaking, liars don’t want to be caught.

They’ll do everything in their power to avoid the truth from coming out.

This means that they are likely to get EXTRA TOUCHY when something you say is threatening to expose them.

This might happen completely UNINTENTIONALLY on your behalf.

For example:

A guy comes home after supposedly hanging out with a friend.

His girlfriend asks him: “How is your friend doing?”

He suddenly gets all riled up and fires at her: “That isn’t any of your business, you always want to get mixed up in everybody else’s life! You’re always so controlling”

That’s a sign that he wasn’t hanging out with a friend that evening and is now trying to cover it up.

Anger is often a reaction to fear.

If your partner gets angry when you inquire into certain things, you might wanna take a closer look.


Spotting a liar is much harder than it seems.

And coming to terms with having being lied to by a person you thought was closest to you, is a whole different level of pain.

So give yourself a pat on the back for even wanting to look into this difficult topic!

People who have been lied to tend to blame themselves for having been naive.

But the truth is lying partners do everything in their power to intentionally keep their significant other in the dark.

If you are dating a liar, remember it’s not your fault and you haven’t done anything to deserve this.

In case you have any questions or other tips about this topic, please let me know in the comments section and I’ll get back to you.


Karolina Bartnik