What Platonic Soulmate Means – 7 Signs You’ve Found Yours

What Platonic Soulmate Means – 7 Signs You’ve Found Yours

Photo by Victoria Strelka

If you’re wondering what the meaning of ‘Platonic soulmate’ is, here’s the simplest explanation:

A platonic soulmate is a special friend that you DON’T share romantic feelings with.

It’s someone with whom you connected with immediately and have a shared understanding with.

But regardless of how much time you spend with your platonic soulmate, neither of you want to hold hands or make out.

That’s what a platonic (flat, without depth) soulmate (a person perfectly suited to you) means.

Otherwise you’re more likely thinking about your Soulmate.

An example of a platonic relationship is someone you share interests with, like a hobby or sport, and with whom you meet on a regular basis.

Afterwards, you might relax somewhere together and talk about your worldviews and beliefs, of which you have a lot in common.

You’ll be able to talk for hours without even realizing how much time has already passed.

7 Platonic Soulmate Signs

So we’ve covered the definition of a platonic soulmate.

But what are the signs of you having actually found yours?

Here are the top 7 to look out for, that’ll help you know for sure!

1. You had an instant connection

Sometimes, it’s enough to just meet your platonic soulmate, and it’s clear that you were meant to have a special connection.

It’s not like with those other people you meet, where conversations trudge along awkwardly, and you’re eager to escape at the first opportunity that presents itself.


With your platonic soulmate, you’ll dive straight into engaging topics that fascinate you and realize how much you have in common.

It’ll be hard to stop talking!

2. You have similar interests

A common second sign is that you’ll have a lot of shared interests with your platonic soulmate.

Whether that’s a certain sports activity or a niche hobby that you, someone else finally understands and appreciates!

3. You’re always there for each other

When the going gets rough, and you need a friend, you’ll be able to count on your platonic soulmate.

  • Having a hard time at work? – You know that you can text or call them to vent about your absolutely incompetent employer.
  • You’ve gone through a breakup? – They’re at your door with pizza and ice cream.
  • ‘Need an accountability buddy? – Your platonic soulmate will drag you to the gym despite your little “But I don’t want to go outside!” tantrum.

And the same will be true for YOU towards THEM!

When they’re in need of a supportive friend, you’ll make time.

4. You see the world through the same eyes

Much like you share interests, you’ll likely also see the world in a similar light.

Whatever frustrates you about people, they’ll just GET IT.

And when your platonic soulmate is annoyed for the umpteenth time about how your government is just screwing everything up, you know what they mean and are vehemently nodding in agreement.

If there are subject matters you DON’T AGREE on, then you and your platonic soul share mutual respect for the other’s view.

5. You can trust them with your insecurities and vulnerabilities

Everybody struggles in life.

And when you’re having a crisis or a meltdown because the voices in your head have gotten the better of you, you know you can count on your platonic soulmate.

You can be vulnerable and share your insecurities with them.

Whether you’re sharing things in a composed manner or are sobbing uncontrollably…

They’ll be the safe space you need and can trust, patiently listening and meaning to understand you.

6. They respect and appreciate you for who you are

Despite having endless things in common with your platonic soulmate, you will still have your differences.

And that’s a good thing, because it means you learn from each other and grow together.

This leads to a relationship in which both of you respect and appreciate the other, with all their strengths and weaknesses.

7. They are there for important moments in your life

Whether it’s that big graduation of yours coming up or your platonic soulmate is celebrating an anniversary…

You’ll both make those important events fit into your calendar.

No excuses or rain check.

Because you actually WANT to be there to show your support.

So, these are the 7 signs of how to know that you’ve found your platonic soulmate.

Not all of them have to fit, it’s more about the signs that mean the most to both of you.

Questions you might have

In addition to the signs, here are some questions you guys have been asking.

These answers will help you clarify what platonic soulmate means and whether you’ve found yours.

What is the difference between soulmates and platonic soulmates?

This simplest way to tell the difference between a soulmate and a platonic soulmate is that platonic soulmates don’t have romantic feelings towards each other.

Whereas, a soulmate relationship will have plenty of chemistry and romantic attraction between both people.

What does it mean when love is platonic?

When love is platonic, it means that the love and appreciation is one of friendship and mutual respect, without the desire to jump into bed with them.

Can you be platonically in love?

…Well, you can totally love someone platonically and love having them in your life because they bring so much to it.

But if you’re ‘in love’, to me, it sounds like you might be developing feelings a little more intense than you would for a platonic soul mate. 😉

Maybe you’re stuck in one-way love?

What is platonic intimacy?

Again, platonic intimacy means that you have a special connection with someone, without any romantic attachment or feelings.

Does platonic love involve kissing?

Sorry, nope. Platonic love does not involve kissing.

If you’re kissing someone on the lips, you guys might be more like platonic soulmates, since you’re expressing romantic and sexual interest in each other!

Maybe one of you is fighting your feelings for the other?

Is a platonic relationship good?

Absolutely! If both parties are happy having a platonic relationship, it means you are mutually benefiting and there’s nothing that speaks against it.

Enjoy it and have fun!

What does platonic love feel like?

Platonic love feels like that best friend you might have had as a kid.

The one you did everything with; ate, played, ran and ate, played, ran all over again until your parents called you home!

Platonic love is basically the adult version of that.

You will still meet to share a meal, do fun things together and possibly activities, but your exchange has the depth and breadth reflective of your adult life.

Is platonic love rare?

Yes. Platonic love is unfortunately rather rare.

Finding a platonic soulmate is a bit like finding a needle in a haystack.

So appreciate and don’t lose yours!

Can you have multiple platonic soulmates?

Sure you can! If you’re lucky enough to find multiple platonic soulmates in your lifetime, appreciate it!

Nothing speaks against it, since no romantic feelings are involved.

So, to recap one last time, a platonic soulmate means: a special friend that you don’t share romantic feelings with.

I hope you’re either going to find yours, or are already having a blast with your new bestie!

Otherwise, if after reading all of this, you think you’ve found your soulmate rather than your platonic soulmate, you can make them want you with these 7 sneaky ways.


7 Very Real Signs Your Soulmate is Thinking of You in 2022

7 Very Real Signs Your Soulmate is Thinking of You in 2022

Photo by Jackson David

How can you know if and when your soulmate is thinking of you?

More traditional experts will tell you that it’s when you get hiccups, goosebumps, keep on sneezing, dream about your soulmate and keep on thinking about them, etc.

These kinds of signs can absolutely be true! But these were all ways of telling your soulmate is thinking about from before the smartphone era.

You see, our devices offer a much greater insight into our minds than most of us realize!

Not only can they reveal what someone might be thinking about, but they also allow for people to deduce a lot about each other from their behavior online.

All the signs mentioned in this post are things our coaching clients keep on getting baffled by. They are extremely common. Yet they’re not often spoken about…

They’re all very real, tangible ways of recognizing that your soulmate is thinking of you in 2022.

1. Your Phone Battery Keeps on Draining Very Fast

When you truly deeply care about someone, you often miss them throughout the day. One way how your soulmate can feel closer to you without actually getting in touch is by checking your location.

So if you’ve been feeling guilty about stalking your soulmate’s location, don’t!

They are likely doing it to you too! Everybody does it!

It’s a way of checking in with someone, without actually revealing that you’re doing it.

Well there is one way to tell when somebody does it…

You see, checking someone’s locations actually drains their battery.

So if your phone keeps on dying unreasonably fast sometimes, know it’s a sign your soulmate is potentially thinking of you and checking where you’re at.

2. Your Soulmate Posts Something Romantic

Another typical sign that your soulmate is thinking of you is when they post something romantic. This could mean a photo of the sunset, a song, quote etc.

Even though it might be a public post available to all of their friends or followers, it was made with a particular person in mind. It’s a way of expressing their feelings and reaching out to you indirectly.

It’s a definite sign your soulmate is thinking of you and likely missing you in that very moment.

3. They Post a Lot, in General

This is another variation of the previous sign. Some people have a harder time expressing romantic feelings. This is why they might keep their posts more neutral.

Social media is a great channel for getting attention.

So if your soulmate has been posting a lot more lately, know that they might be doing it because they are thinking of you and trying to impress you.

4. You Keep On Bumping Into Each Other

This is another classic behavior that’s extremely common, but people still get surprised by it.

Have you unexpectedly bumped into your soulmate recently and thought to yourself: “What are the odds? Clearly, the universe wants us to be together.”

Well, it’s not just the universe who is making this happen….

Technology nowadays allows us to predict where a person is going to be without arranging for them to be there.

Maybe your soulmate checked your schedule or the events you are going to.

If they unexpectedly bumped into you, it’s not necessarily a coincidence.

It could also be a sign that they are thinking of you and wanted to maximize their chances of seeing you again.

5. They Like Your Old Posts on Social Media

This is another classic soulmate behavior that leaves people puzzled and confused:

Has your special someone recently liked some really old posts of yours?

Maybe this made you wonder: “Why would they do this? Did they really scroll through my profile this far back?”

Checking out someone’s social media profile allows you to feel closer to them without having to reach out. It’s also a way to learn more about a person.

So if your soulmate liked some really old posts of yours recently, know that it’s a sign they are thinking of you and craving to feel closer.

6. They’re the First Person to React to Your Posts

When you deeply care about someone, you’re also very eager to express your support and appreciation for that person.

One way your soulmate can do this is by quickly reacting to everything you post.

It’s a sign they are thinking of you, maybe even hovering over your profile, waiting to hear from you again.

7. They Know Things About You, You Haven’t Told Them About

When you’re really in love with someone, you’re desperate to get to know them better. But it’s not always easy to ask them questions directly.

Our online presence as well as our friends are like a database of information about us.

If your soulmate knows things about you, you haven’t told them about, it’s a sign that they are thinking of you, studying your social media or talking to your friends about you.

What Does a Soulmate Connection Feel Like?

I hope you enjoyed these very real 7 signs your soulmate is thinking of you in 2022. Meeting your soulmate can be extremely exhilarating. But at the same time, it can be very vulnerable to feel this way about another person.

It’s only natural for you to want to be sure that your soulmate cares and is thinking of you just as much as you are.

This kind of connection tends to be a bit of a rollercoaster, with lots of ups and downs.

Ultimately, though, what makes it so special is this deep sense of understanding you likely feel with this other person. It just feels right and things fall into place.

A soulmate connection feels like home.

Despite all the uncertainties, you have a feeling of peace, safety and security because you know how special and rare it is to feel this way about someone.

If you’re looking for more reassurance if your significant other really is your soulmate, check out my other post: 9 Signs of True Love From a Man

And on a different note, the whole topic of soulmates can actually be a rather difficult one. This is why down below I’m going to address some questions you guys have been asking about.

Do Soulmates End up Together?

This is something I was asking myself when my husband and I started dating. I knew that we had a very special connection, but I wasn’t sure if it meant that we will get together or not and if it was going to last.

Intense feelings tend to trigger a lot of emotions. This is why soulmate relationships tend to be accompanied by a certain degree of drama.

So much so, it might even lead to breakups, especially in the first few years of the relationship.

This was true for my husband and I, as well as a lot of our coaching clients. We broke up and got back together multiple times.

Ultimately though, soulmate connection is extremely strong, this is why in most cases soulmates do end up together.

Even if they break up, they won’t be able to resist it and will find a way back to each other.

How Do You Feel When Your Soulmate Leaves You

When your soulmate leaves you, you’re sad and often even devastated. But at the same time you will likely feel a lot of disbelief.

This can’t be it?

How can they do this to me?

They can’t possibly really mean or want it?

Your soulmate leaving you often feels like a mistake.

That it’s not what was supposed to happen, and that things aren’t over yet.

Even if your ex is pretending to be over you, deep down you will have a feeling that they still care about you and love you.

How Long Do Soulmate Relationships Last

Soulmate connection is a very strong bond. It’s not something that will easily fade over time.

When you feel this way about someone, and they reciprocate it, you won’t be able to really let go of one another.

This was the case for us, and I see the very same thing with a lot of our coaching clients.

Even when people genuinely try to move on, they still rarely manage to actually go through with it.


This kind of connection is not something you can easily escape…

This is why soulmate relationships generally last a lifetime.

Unfortunately, though, this doesn’t mean the two people will stay in a committed relationship together.

Some soulmates won’t be able to deal with all the drama and fighting. This is why they might keep on breaking up and getting back together for years.

But even if they aren’t exclusively committed to one another, their connection never really vanishes.

I hope my article put you at ease and helped you read some strange, confusing soulmate behaviors correctly.

If you have any questions, please leave them in the comments, and I’ll get back to you.

Thank you for reading!


When Is Enough Enough? How to Know When to Give Up and Let Go

When Is Enough Enough? How to Know When to Give Up and Let Go

Photo by Eric Ward

Have you been pouring your heart and soul into making something work, only to have most of your efforts fall flat, leaving you frustrated and wondering: when is enough, enough?

Regardless whether it’s a job, relationship, marriage, friendship, a relative or something entirely different that is draining you this way, it’s important to recognize the right time to give up and let go.

There is no point investing more into something that is never going to work out!

But at the same time, you have to be certain you gave it your best and did everything you possibly could. This way, you can avoid having regrets about this further down the road.

I’ve been in this situation countless time myself, so I know how hard it is to be on the verge of saying: “Enough is enough!”. Giving up on someone or something you put a lot of effort into is always heartbreaking.

It might make you question if it was all for nothing. Or if you were deceived and what you thought was real, turned out not to be true. These are all extremely difficult things to face.

But at the same time, sometimes you have to be willing to let go of the outcome in order to actually get what you want out of a situation, or get your message across in a relationship.

Sometimes it takes you walking away for other people to cave in and snap out of their stubborn frame of mind.

This is a bit of a paradox I will come back to at the end of this article, but first let’s cover how to recognize when is enough, enough.

How Do You Know When Enough Is Enough?

It’s not easy to know the right time to let go of something or someone. It’s hard to give up on things you’ve invested a lot into. Also, these kinds of decision sometimes carry irreversible consequences.

For example, quitting a job might mean losing this work environment forever.

In the same way, giving up on a relationship might mean that it will be the end of it.

This is why I’ve prepared a list of signs to help you recognize when enough is enough. This way, you can know you’re in a hopeless situation, and it’s time to let go of it.


1. Enough Is Enough When You’re the Only One Making Things Work

Any interpersonal relationship needs to be mutual in order to remain healthy.

Regardless whether this is about your job, family, friendship or romantic relationship, if you’re the only person who is putting in the effort into keeping things going, know that you’re being taken for granted.

The world is a tough place, and you are your own best protector. You have to stand up for yourself and not let other people endlessly use you.

This is particularly true in relationships. Being endlessly giving toward your partner never ends well.

So if you’re the only glue that keeps things together, it’s likely time to say: enough is enough! It’s not healthy for you to stay in a situation where you’re being used all the time.

You deserve better!

2. When You Keep On Blaming Yourself for Everything

Another tell-tale sign that it might be the time to say enough is enough, is when you keep on blaming yourself and taking responsibility for everything that isn’t going right.

For example, if you don’t feel valued at work and haven’t gotten a raise in a while, maybe you’re thinking: “Oh I’m just not trying hard enough plus they really don’t have the money to give me a raise at the moment…”.

In the context of a romantic relationship or an unhealthy family situation, an example of this would be you constantly making excuses and blaming yourself for your loved one’s outbursts.

“Oh, they didn’t mean it that way.”

“They’re just having a hard time right now.”

“Maybe I am being needy and unrealistic…”

A certain amount of fighting is normal and healthy in a relationship.

But if you’re walking on eggshells and blaming yourself for everything that is going wrong, know that it’s not good for you to tolerate this kind of treatment.

Your needs matter.

Moreover, someone else’s problems don’t justify them lashing out at you or denying you things.

If this is your situation, it might be a sign that enough is enough, it’s time for you to let go and make a change.

3. When You Never Get What You Want

Another way to tell when enough is enough is if you feel like you can never have what you want.

This might be a position at your job that keeps on being given to somebody else, that trip you’ve been wanting to go on with your significant other for years, or having your boundaries respected and your needs and acknowledged.

Maybe you’ve been longing for certain things for so long, you might be already coming to terms with never even getting what you want.

I used to struggle with this one in regard to getting enough attention from people. I kept on waiting for them to finally start thinking of me, only to be disappointed over and over again.

Eventually I grew tired of begging for attention and realized enough is enough. I will never have what I want if endlessly just keep on waiting for people to give it to me.

I had to let go of hoping that things will change by themselves and changed them myself.

So if you feel like you can never get what you want, it’s a sign that enough is enough. It’s time for you to give up hoping and waiting, and go and get what you want yourself.

4. Enough is Enough When You Tried Everything Already

One way to know enough is enough is when you feel like you’ve tried your best to fix a problem or a relationship. But despite all of your efforts, things still aren’t working out.

So you’re at a loss of what to do next.

Because it feels like you just run out of options at this point!

Some situations truly are hopeless. Unfortunately, you can’t force certain things to happen. Especially when other people are involved.

Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be…

Dwelling on this will only bring you more pain. When there is nothing more you can do, it’s a sign that enough is enough.

It’s time to cut your loses and let go.

Especially when you love someone, it’s hard to face that things might be over for good. But if they truly care about you, it’ll be a wake-up call for them, and they’ll fight for you.

5. When You Decide That Enough Is Enough

Last but not least, you don’t have to wait for all the signs to fit your situation to know when to let go of something.

Maybe this isn’t your first time facing this type of difficulties. So even though, things might not be that bad just yet, you know where they are headed.

Or maybe things are really hard for you, but you still feel guilty.

You might worry that giving up and saying enough is enough might mean that you didn’t really care about this thing or person you’re so frustrated with.

The thing is, you don’t have to stay committed to something or someone who is making you miserable. It’s ok to give up.

Moreover, sometimes it takes walking away or even cutting someone off, to get them to realize what they’re losing.

You can decide for yourself that enough is enough.

If deep down you feel this way, you can trust your instinct and respect your own limits.

At What Point Is Enough Enough in a Relationship?

All the signs mentioned above absolutely apply to relationships too. But on top of all these things, I want to discuss this paradox that I briefly mentioned in the introduction already:

Sometimes it takes saying enough is enough and letting go, for your partner to cave in and finally come your way.

I made this experience countless time in my own relationship! Whenever I push my husband to give me something, he will often remain resistant to all my efforts.

But when I let go of trying to control the outcome and give him a choice instead, more often than not, he will choose to give me what I want!

So saying enough is enough in relationship can actually be a good thing.

Because it can help you break out of your own self-defeating patters!

I’ve observed the same mechanism when coaching people on how to fix their relationship problems or get their ex back.

When you love someone, it’s often harder to say enough is enough. It actually forces you to face certain difficult truths about them. That they’re not exactly the person you wanted them to be.

But coming to terms with things the way they are can often be a pivotal moment that can turn everything around and heal a relationship.

So don’t think that saying enough is enough will be the end of your relationship, because it’s generally the opposite. It’s staying miserable and letting grudges pile up that leads to people slowly losing interest and growing apart.

When Is Enough Enough in a Marriage?

The same rules that apply to relationships, also apply to marriage. With the difference being that it’s much harder to end a marriage than it is to break up.

It might feel like saying enough is enough to your spouse will be the end of things.

But it doesn’t generally work this way.

People tend to think in extremes.

I’m guilty of this myself too. I often dramatize that me giving up on something will be the end. But saying enough is enough and coming clean with where I’m really at often becomes a fresh beginning.

So don’t think that you deciding to let go will be the end of your marriage. What it might end up being is the very thing that saves it instead!

If after reading all this, you still feel stuck and don’t know what to do, this is something we can help you with in a one-on-one coaching call.

SimplyTogether Coaching Calls

Here, either me or my husband Gabriel will listen to you and help you recognize if your situation really is hopeless or not.

We’ll then give you tips on what to do to test things, so that you can be sure you’re making the right choice.

If you’re interested, click here to learn more about our coaching calls.

Thank you for reading! If you have any questions, leave them in the comments below, and I’ll get back to you.

And If you’re looking for some comfort in knowing that you’re not alone in feeling this way, check out: 50 Sad One Sided Relationship Quotes About One Way Love


Can a Man Sleep With a Woman Without Developing Feelings – The Honest Truth

Can a Man Sleep With a Woman Without Developing Feelings – The Honest Truth

Photo by Yan Krukov

Can a man sleep with a woman without developing feelings?

The short answer is YES.

Yes, men can and do sleep with you without emotional connection.

Men do it all the time, all around the world.

In fact, I can tell you, as a guy, that it’s actually something men often take PRIDE in.

It’s about conquests, and sleeping with women is just another notch on their belt that they can brag about to their buds.

Yes, it’s sad.

But, there’s a big BUT in all of this, though.

Men typically don’t develop feelings, BUT it’s because they’ve been conditioned to believe they have none.

And people don’t dare speak it out.

Because it threatens the familiar and established ways in which men sleep around to derive their sense of ‘self-worth’ and rank themselves amongst peers.

More on that later…

So if you plan on, or have already slept with, a guy you’ve caught feelings for.

Then this post will help you understand the underlying male psychology that prevents men from developing feelings for women.

And we’ll also talk about how to turn that around and make a man crave you emotionally.

Let’s get to it.

How Do You Know He Just Wants to Sleep With You?

There are many indicators, but here are the top three to easily identify whether a man just wants to sleep with you superficially:

1. He’s instantly ready to sleep with you

One of the easiest ways to tell if a man is using you, is he’ll jump into bed with any woman right away, no questions asked.

Men that aren’t serious will have no boundaries when it comes to sex.

They will take any opportunity that crosses their path to fuel, what I believe to be, a misguided sense of self-worth.

So if you’re looking for a guy to connect with emotionally, you might want to consider passing on this type of man.

2. He doesn’t care to get to know you

Another tell-tale sign that he’ll sleep with women without developing feelings, is the LACK of effort he’ll make to truly know you as a person.

He’ll keep things surface level and detached.

On the flip-side, players can be socially skilled and will mimic what resembles being curious about you, so watch out for those signs.

3. His focus is set on getting you in bed

How do you know if he only wants your body?

If every other thing he does or says is related to steering you towards his or your bedroom, then he just wants to sleep with you.

These men’s weakness is often their impatience, so you can easily identify them by suggesting you meet again.

If he’s a man who develops feelings, he’ll be up for it.

If he leaves at this point or pushes even harder to sleep with you tonight, then he’s not serious about his emotions towards women.

So check whether two or more of these signs fit, if so, he’s not the type to develop feelings and just wants to sleep with you.

Don’t waste your time on him.

How Do You Know When a Guy Is Emotionally Attached?

When a guy is emotionally attached, he’ll give you very different signs from an emotionally unavailable man.

For the most part, he’ll do the exact OPPOSITE of what a guy who just wants to sleep with women does.

This means:

  • He’ll likely take his time before sleeping with you
  • He’ll make plenty of effort to get to know you
  • His focus will be on other things than just sex

And if you have already slept with him, he definitely won’t just ghost you.

Instead, he’ll want to spend MORE quality time with you and go on dates.

And in case you’re wondering how long it takes for a guy to catch feelings.

Know that it often takes longer with men…

Expect months (even years, I would know!) to go by for a man before he admits his feelings for you.

And now let’s get to the bottom of why that is and what you can do to change it!

Why It’s So Difficult for Men to Develop Feelings

At the beginning of this post, I mentioned that men often don’t develop feelings, because they’ve been conditioned to BELIEVE they have none.

And that this is because they think they have to fulfill the male standards of sleeping with a lot of women.

Naturally, developing feelings for you would make it more difficult to just move onto another woman

So instead they deny and repress their emotions and continue on their misguided quest of trying to feel more confident about themselves.

You can think of it as men being in an endless competitive race of who has the highest body count of women.

And when they meet, they stack up against each other to determine who’s ‘The Man’.

The “winners” get to temporarily feel good about themselves and mistake it for confidence and feeling worthy of love.

And with a man of this mentality, any woman who asks him about his feelings for her, will be accused of trying to ‘tie him down’.

So that’s what you’re competing against, the misguided boys club.

At times, the testosterone and bromance levels in these groups are so through the roof, that I’ve honestly wondered whether an all out gay orgy wasn’t about to ensue.

But that’s a story for another time.

In cases like these, looking for signs that he’s fighting his feelings for you can help you read between the lines.

What Makes a Man Develop Feelings for a Woman?

Now that we’ve talked about the reasons men don’t allow themselves to develop feelings for women, the question becomes…

How do you make a man crave you emotionally?

First, you need to be clear about how removed he might be from how he feels.

Because some guys are so gone, they have zero capacity to truly connect with a woman, no matter how many times they sleep with someone.

And they will fight their own feelings for you to the grave.

So if he’s this type of guy, seriously, don’t waste your time.

Chemistry is not something you force between a woman and a man, it’s something that happens between them.

But if you’re sure that there was a spark between both of you, and he’s just denying it for the above-mentioned reasons, then you stand a chance!

Now, the trick to make a guy realize his feelings for you, is to play along with his silly games of remaining aloof and distant.

As previously mentioned, it takes TIME for guys.

It took me years to truly understand the depth of my attachment to Karolina (my wife, who runs this blog with me).

But when the chemistry is strong enough, he’ll gradually develop more feelings for you and show it.

Often in gestures, rather than words.

(You can of course also make him want you in sneakier ways)

So if you’re crazy enough about this guy, be patient, stay by his side and know that he’s in denial of his feelings for you (for now).

This consistent behavior is what ultimately makes a man fall in love.

I of course hope it works for you guys.

But if after reading this, you’re riddled with uncertainty about his feelings for you, it might be helpful to see if the signs he isn’t into you fit for you.

Thank you for reading and I hope this post gave you some clarity on whether men can sleep with women without developing feelings!

If you have any questions, please leave them in the comments section, and I’ll get back to you.


101 Cute Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

101 Cute Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

Photo by Ronny Sison

Looking for cute questions to ask your boyfriend to make him express things and fall in love with you more?

In this article, I’ll give you lots of ideas of various things you can talk with him about.

I’ll divide this list into a few sections:

  • Cute Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend
  • Cute and Flirty Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend
  • Romantic Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend
  • Deep Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend
  • Cute Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend Over Text

But before jumping into the particular cute things you can ask him, I first want to outline a very important principle when it comes to this!

This is something, many other relationship experts tent to overlook, but it can make a world of difference in your relationship.

When asking your boyfriend cute questions, try to make it about him and not about yourself.

Asking your boyfriend things that are revolving all around you will make you come across as self-absorbed and needy.

This is why, you want to avoid saying things like: “What do you like most about me?” or “Do you think about me during the day?”.

Shifting your focus to him and asking him genuine questions, on the other hand, will make him perceive you as caring and will inevitably deepen his emotional attachment towards you.

All the examples listed below fit these criteria.

Cute Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

This is a list of lighthearted, charming things to ask a guy. They are slightly flirty but in an unassuming, innocent way. They are the perfect thing to say as an icebreaker or even when you’re just bored.

There are many things you can do to make your partner love you more. Asking him these kinds of questions is one of them!

1. Do you have a favorite moment in our relationship?

2. Do you prefer: beach or mountains?

3. What are you looking for in a woman?

4. Is there any food you would give up your relationship for?

5. What do you usually do when you’re bored?

6. Who inspires you to be a better person?

7. What makes you laugh more than anything?

8. What’s an activity you’d really like to do with me that we haven’t done so far?

9. If you could describe yourself with three words, what would they be?

10. What’s your favorite season?

11. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

12. What movie would you like us to watch together?

13. If you won the lottery tomorrow, what would be the first thing you buy?

14. What do you do to cheer yourself up?

15. Did you send an awkward text to someone by mistake?

16. What was the last crazy adventure you went on last you went on?

17. What would you do tomorrow if it were your last day on Earth?

18. Do you have any secret talents?

19. What were you like as a kid?

20. What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?

Cute and Flirty Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

These questions will definitely heat things up between the two of you. They are juicy, flirty (but not overly explicit) things to ask your boyfriend to tease him a little.

Beware, exchanges of this type will likely lead to more than just talking….

Asking a guy these questions will definitely make him want you more.

21. Do you prefer being the big spoon or the little spoon?

22. Who was your first kiss, and how was it?

23. What is your wildest fantasy?

24. What are you most attracted to in a woman?

25. Have you ever been caught doing something you shouldn’t have been doing?

26. What do you think about public display of affection?

27. What do you like to do the most when you’re alone?

28. Have you ever skinny-dipped?

29. What’s your opinion on kissing in public?

30. What’s your favorite type of women’s underwear?

31. What do you think would happen if we were stuck in a room for 24 hours together?

32. If you could be a girl for a day, what’s the first thing you’d do?

33. What’s the funniest pickup line you’ve ever tried?

34. Have you ever found someone attractive who you really shouldn’t?

35. Do you prefer to make the first move?

36. Do you prefer kissing or cuddling?

37. What is it about you, I’m so drawn to?

38. What are you thinking right now?

39. Am I your type?

40. Truth or dare?

Romantic Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

The aim of these romantic questions is to trigger butterflies in his stomach as well as in yours. Asking your boyfriend these questions will make him get in touch with his feelings for you.

There will be love in the air, both of you can definitely deeply enjoy!

A word of caution, though: some guys get frightened by romance. But don’t let this discourage you. All the questions listed below are guy approved, low-key romantic type.

Plus, you might just need to warm your boyfriend up with some flirting or by telling him that you love him beforehand. (This way you can get his guard down a little…)

41. Do you believe in true love?

42. What’s your idea of a perfect date?

43. Would you move across the world to be with someone you love?

44. In one sentence, how would you sum up romance?

45. What’s your favorite romantic moment in a movie and why?

46. Who was your first crush?

47. How many times have you been in love?

48. What is your idea of a romantic honeymoon destination?

49. How would you define love?

50 What made you fall for me?

51. Is there such a thing as being too much in love?

52. If the house was on fire, what three things would you save?

53. How can I be a better girlfriend for you?

54. What is your idea of the perfect romantic gift?

55 Guess what I like about you the most?

56. Do you believe there’s one person you’re ‘meant’ to be with?

57. Do you believe in fate? Destiny?

58. Where is your favorite place to be with me?

59. What’s your favorite way to receive affection?

60. If we could go anywhere together right now, where would you want to go?

Deep Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

All the questions below are cute, but also meaningful and deep at the same time. They will make you feel emotionally closer to your boyfriend and will help you gain more of his trust.

You will also learn new things about him and likely feel more connected because of this exchange.

They are all great questions that will make any date much more exciting and memorable.

61. What quality do you like most about yourself?

62. Is there something that you used to do that you loved, but you’ve now stopped doing?

63. If you could tell yourself one thing 10 years ago, what would it be?

64. Is there something about love that scares you?

65. What’s your biggest deal-breaker in a relationship?

66. What are you most proud of?

67. Are you strangely sentimental about any objects you own?

68. What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

69. How do you think your closest friends would describe you?

70. What is your biggest fear in life?

71. What is the kindest thing someone has ever done for you?

72. Do you think there’s such a thing as the ‘right’ person for you?

73. What’s the hardest thing you’ve had to overcome in life?

74. If you could ask me anything, what would it be?

75. What’s the most valuable thing in your life?

76. How did you like growing up?

77. What’s your greatest passion in life?

78. What would you like our shared goals to be this year?

79. In what ways do you feel loved by me?

80. What is something that not many people know about you?

Cute Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend Over Text

These are playful, slightly flirty but unassuming questions. They are safe to send to your boyfriend, your crush, or even a guy who is fighting his feelings for you.

They are perfect as conversation starters, but can also be used to get more of his attention.

81. What are you thinking about right now?

82. What’s your “go to” video or GIF for a laugh?

83. How many questions can you answer in just pictures?

84. What app on your phone do you think I should get?

85. What is your favorite meme?

86. Do you ever text and drive?

87. If I sent you a picture right now, what would you want to see?

88. Wanna Netflix and chill?

89. What song do you play most often?

90. What’s the worst text that you accidentally sent?

91. How about dinner at my place?

92. What is the most interesting thing you have on you or near you right now? Send me a pic of it.

93. What’s the funniest picture you have on your phone?

94. How many texts do you normally send in a day?

95. What is the perfect way to ask someone out?

96. What’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve seen online recently?

97. Is there an App you think I should download?

98. What’s the funniest thing that someone could spend money on / buy on the internet?

99. What would you love to be called – sexy, charming, or smart?

100. Would you rather wake up tomorrow as the opposite sex or 50 years older?

101. What’s the cutest picture you have on your phone?

Hope you found what you were looking for here, and you now have plenty of cute things to ask your boyfriend over text or next time you’re hanging out with him.

But in case you need even more inspiration, you can check out my husband’s post:

50 Flirty Texts to Make Him Think About You All Day Long

These are all guy approved, safe to send texts that will make any guy crazy about you.

Thank you for reading and if you have any questions about these questions, be sure to leave them down below, and I’ll get back to you!


11 Best Ways to Get an Avoidant to Chase You

11 Best Ways to Get an Avoidant to Chase You

Photo by Gary Barnes

You’re interested in an avoidant, but aren’t sure how to get them to chase you?

Avoidants are tricky, since they’re suspicious of relationships and intimacy to begin with.

And when things get a bit more serious between you guys, they might quickly WITHDRAW to avoid what they fear will inevitably end in abandonment.

Often without giving you a chance to even talk!

So in order to get an avoidant to chase you, you need to strike the right balance of piquing their interest without setting off their (often false) alarm bells.

In this article, I will explain to you how to do exactly that.

Let’s start by talking about the basics of attracting an avoidant.

How Do You Attract Avoidants?

Whether you are single and have a keen eye for a particular avoidant or want to know what attracts avoidant partners in relationship, the one big principle remains the same:

You have to take the PRESSURE OFF of them.

Because avoidants spook easily and are constantly on the lookout for any potential red flags that might signal it’s time to turn tail.

This means that if you want to charm an avoidant, you’ll need to go SLOW and carefully for them to eventually chase you.

And that is what will ultimately make you attractive to the avoidant that holds a special place in your heart.

You taking the pressure off of them is what will make them label you as ‘Safe’.

And SAFETY is spelled in capital letters in an avoidants book, even if they justify their distance with some creative rationalizations.

So play it cool and keep things general, DON’T PUSH for anything.

This way you’ll spark their interest, and they’ll start feeling attracted to you.

How Do You Make an Avoidant Chase You?

Now that we’ve nailed the first point, we’re ready to get your avoidant to chase you.

And be sure you do, because if you haven’t got their interest yet, you’ll be jumping ahead when trying to make them chase you.

Which will sabotage your efforts.

But once you’ve gotten some good rapport down, and you’ve induced the ‘safety feelings’ with them, then you’ll be ready to get them to chase you.

Note that many of the ways to make an avoidant chase you that we’re going to cover here are driven by the aforementioned principle of taking the pressure off.

So keep that in mind as you interact with them.

1. Don’t Chase Them

If you’re wondering whether avoidants ever chase…

Then the answer is yes.

But you have to LET THEM get there!

Which perfectly highlights our first point: don’t chase them.

Nothing sends an avoidant scurrying for the hills faster than someone who is openly expressing interest and chasing them.

Instead, play your game a little more cool, but not cold.

Leave just enough breadcrumbs for them to want to chase you for the next delicious one…

2. Adapt to Their Slow Pace

If you’re someone who likes to move at a fast pace in relationships, then be prepared to adjust to some new speed limitats.

Because avoidants tend to move sloooowwly.

And yes, they do so because they’re afraid of getting hurt.

That isn’t to say this journey can’t be fun and healthy!

You, too, can enjoy the safety of a slower ride and take in the sights and sounds of a slow paced cruise with them.

And when you do, they’ll be MUCH MORE likely to trust and chase you.

3. Be Prepared for Their Communication Quirks

Now, this doesn’t apply to avoidants as a whole, but a good chunk of them can be a little slow and spotty when it comes to replying to texts or calls.

They’re called AVOIDANTS for good reason 😉

So be patient with them and give them the benefit of a doubt.

They might be having a little freak-out over your relationship and need time to regroup.

If they don’t reach out for too long, feel free to check in with them and if there’s still nothing, consider that even no-response is a response.

4. Let Them Be Distant

A good way to get an avoidant to chase you, is to let them be distant when they’re (maybe indirectly) asking for some distance.

It’s important to show them that you’re okay with them needing time to themselves.

(This is where they’ll often try to safely process their thoughts and emotions.)

Now, don’t panic and try to reel them back in.

Tell them you “understand and hope to speak again soon.”

Remember, if you’ve done nothing, then it’s got NOTHING to do with you.

Giving an avoidant this kind of understanding when they’re distant is what will make them chase you again soon!

5. Be Reliable

Since avoidants can be fearful of being emotionally ambushed or abandoned, a great way to get them to pursue you is to prove your reliability.

What this means is, if you say you’ll do something, be sure to do it.

Be punctual, be transparent, and be there for them in a difficult moment.

Because avoidants secretly CRAVE for someone to disprove their nihilistic worldview and have a reliable shoulder to cry and rely on instead.

So don’t miss the opportunity to be that special someone for them.

They’ll hold you in the highest regard for it.

6. Give Them Enough Space

I’m sure you’ve also needed your space from people at times.

We all do.

Having time to ourselves helps us feel safe, reconnect with our feelings, and make sense of things.

Avoidants are no different, other than that they need a lot MORE space.

You respecting their boundaries is what will also make them chase- and want to be with you.

If you’re unsure how much space to give, here’s how to give space the right way.

7. No Pushing

When your avoidant becomes distant or needs space, you might find it difficult to be patient and wait things out, if it’s been dragging out for a week.

It’s okay to check in with them once or twice, but if you want them to chase you, it’s best to REFRAIN from frequently texting or calling them.

They’ll feel pushed to make a decision, and you might guess what their decision will be…

Exactly, MORE distance and space!

So do your best to be patient with them, do your own thing to fill in the time and eventually your avoidant will come out of their hidey-hole.

8. Prove Your Trustworthiness

Trust is a BIG ONE for avoidants.

So making active efforts to gain their trust is definitely something that will make an avoidant crave and chase you.

But beware of the flip side.

Because when trust is broken with avoidants, they may take a long time to recover from it.

Being communicative and transparent with them will help you avoid misunderstandings that could break trust.

And be sure to steer clear of the most common pitfalls that break trust.

9. Let Them Make the Next Step

Avoidants may have a hard time saying “No” to you.

So if you’re enthusiastically making the next steps in your relationship, they might agree at the moment, but once alone, they’ll withdraw and reduce contact.

By letting them move your relationship forward at their own pace, you’re ensuring they won’t feel pressured to say “Yes” to something they DON’T actually feel ready for yet.

This will help them relax, and they’ll appreciate and CHASE you more!

10. Be a Source of Encouragement

Since avoidants can be more isolationist and unsure of themselves, you’ll earn BIG bonus points in their eyes by encouraging them.

Whatever their insecurities may be, giving them acknowledgement and validation will help them feel better.

And there’s nothing an avoidant chases more than someone who makes them feel confident and good about themselves.

11. Communicate Your Limits

Now we’ve talked about how to get an avoidant to chase you.

And as you can see, there are many things you can do, to help encourage them to come your way.

But since no one is an endless source of understanding and endlessly giving doesn’t end well

You’ll need to gently but clearly communicate your limits to your avoidant.

If they are too scrutinizing and suspicious of you, or they aren’t responding to your texts for a week, then it’s important to also set boundaries for yourself.

And if your avoidant CARES ENOUGH about the relationship, they will try to make ends meet.

So that sums up the 11 best ways to get an avoidant to chase you, here they are again:

1. Don’t chase them
2. Adapt to their slow pace
3. Be prepared for their communication quirks
4. Let them be distant
5. Be reliable
6. Give them enough space
7. No pushing
8. Prove your trustworthiness
9. Let them make the next step
10. Be a source of encouragement
11. Communicate your limits

If you’d like any help with getting through to an avoidant so that they finally pursue you, you can check out our one-on-one coaching calls both my wife and I offer.

SimplyTogether Coaching Calls

Here, we’ll give you tailored advice and tips to navigate what can feel like walking on eggshells with your avoidant, so that you can get through to them.

If that sounds interesting to you, click here to find out more about coaching.

Otherwise, you might also find it helps to learn the 6 Ways to Help Your Partner Open Up.

Thank you for reading, I hope my post gave you some insight, and as always feel free to drop your questions in the comments section.

See you next time,