So you were with a guy and unfortunately, things didn’t work out the way you hoped…
Hurtful things were said and done, one thing escalated into the other and one or both of you decided it was finally time to break up…
But days, months or even years passed and you feel that the connection you had with him was really intimate and special to you and that it’s not something you want to give up on just yet.
You’ve decided you want to get your ex back.
And that’s exactly what we’re going to help you do here.
I’m going to show you how you can finally get your ex back and do so in a way that guarantees he will stay so that you feel stable with him and NEVER have to fear losing him again!
And this approach is foolproof and will work via texting or in person and also whether you’ve been out of touch for months or if the breakup only happened yesterday.
Let’s dive in.
1. Scope Out Your Ex’s Situation and Feelings
When my girlfriend Karolina (who runs this blog with me today) and I first broke up, it was heartbreaking for both of us.
But I was -regretfully- the one who instigated it.
And I want to tell you right away, that men can be very tricky to handle when you want to get back together with them.
We can be extremely sensitive drama queens! -or should I say, drama kings?-
Your ex-boyfriend might be playing cool, distant and uncaring as to whether or not you get back together…
…but DON’T FALL for it!
Because men are only PRETENDING to have zero emotional stakes in the game when in reality they have as much skin in it as you do.
And they’re also easily frightened off!
So it’s important to take the right approach to avoid potentially screwing up your chances.
I hate to say it, but you may need to handle your ex with kid gloves at times and be very careful and tactful!
Like I said, drama kings.
This is why I don’t recommend diving right in and trying to get back together with him.
Ideally, you’ll first carefully scope out his situation:
- Is he still clearly into you?
- Does he let it show?
- Do you know or suspect he’s dating other women?
- Are there other things that might be getting in the way of getting him back?
Doing your crafty research first will ensure you get a full picture of what’s up on his end and how he feels about you.
And this will set you up in maximizing your chances of getting your ex back!
2. Get His Side So That He Craves You Again
There was obviously a reason for the two of you to have initially broken up.
Whether it was due to constant fights and hurt, cheating or you both simply wanted different things from your relationship…
Whatever your reasons may have been and whoever’s fault it was, something between you broke enough for it to have led to you separating.
Now in order for you to get him back, that broken thing needs to be addressed.
I’m not saying fixed but addressed to at least SOME degree.
The reason to do this is to gain his interest and trust again.
Because when you get his side of the story, you are reestablishing your shared connection with him. (again, regardless of who’s fault the breakup really was)
And that’s a very POWERFUL thing!
You see, you are taking down the wall that caused him to go from “your partner”, to “your ex”.
You’re making him FEEL things towards you again.
And by that, he’s reminded of all the good things about you that he’s missing out on.
This is the FASTEST way back to a man’s heart. Despite what you might have heard about it being between his legs.
What sparked my interest in getting back with Karolina after our breakup was NOT the sex.
Sure, sex is a part of it.
But it really was because she understood me and got my side in a way no other woman did.
This made me trust her and I instantly wanted to get back with her again!
So use your shared experiences and history to your advantage.
3. Send Your Ex Sexy Signals So He Doesn’t Miss Your Intentions
You don’t need to say anything outright to him about wanting to get back together yet.
But men can be ridiculously oblivious to women being interested in them.
Yes, even when it’s their own ex!
So don’t make the mistake of going all cold and distant on his ass. (This can push him even further away from you!)
Instead, let him know what’s up.
That you would like to meet for a coffee and talk a little or that you miss him and the way his voice sounds.
Don’t go overboard, but do signal your interest and feel free to flirt!
It’s an exciting time after all and I can assure you, that the anticipation of potential hot-get-back-together-sex is mutual!
4. Secure Your Relationship With Him For Good
A lot of what we’ve covered so far, are things you might do over your phone.
But once you’re actually meeting face to face, it’s a different game.
Things are suddenly more real.
You’ll have a lot of feelings, as will your ex. (Especially if you haven’t seen each other in a while)
The air might feel electrified and even brushing elbows will send a tingle down your spine.
It’s almost like you’re dating all over again…
Now, rediscovering the spark with your ex and getting back together is great, but it’s only the first step.
If you’re serious about things working out this time and actually KEEPING him and ensuring your special connection it’s best to firmly secure your ties with him NOW.
(and I’m not talking about getting engaged here.)
I mean something far more potent: securing a deep unbreakable bond with your man.
Karolina and I made the mistake of not doing so and it resulted in multiple horrible breakups.
We just didn’t know how to prevent the pattern of going from feeling super close and intimate to being so tired of each other that we broke up!
But through a lot of trial and error, we figured out what was causing the constant fights and breakups and finally DID put a stop to it.
If you’re interested in learning how to get him back and permanently secure your relationship, then you might find the Coaching Calls we offer helpful.
Here we’ll support you in figuring out how to talk to him after a breakup so that he is drawn back to you again and what you need to do to finally stop the pattern of heartbreaking distance. You’ll also learn what common mistakes to avoid (like doing no-contact) when trying to get your ex back and what strategies to apply instead.
If you have questions or thoughts you’d like to share, let me know in the comments section and I’ll get back to you.
- He Gets Defensive When I Tell Him How I Feel – How to Get Through - 5. July, 2021
- Why Do I Need Constant Reassurance in a Relationship - 23. June, 2021
- Caught in a Love-Hate Relationship, Should You Worry? - 22. March, 2021